An update

[popkin16]

I'm doing...ok. Work has been extremely overwhelming - they increased the number of grocery orders per day we can get (worst timing ever), and on top of that we have the expected online holiday craziness. Lots of new people, quite a few experienced coworkers on leave, and all combined it leaves me feeling exhausted and overwhelmed a lot. Two days off doesn't seem to be enough time to recover before I'm thrown back into things. I'm by turns exhausted and apathetic, and I keep forgetting things. Nothing too important (like meds or appointments, for example), just...little things. I've been setting a lot of reminders on my phone, and then forgetting to check my phone. Brain fog is the worst.

Hopefully things will settle after the New Year and I'll feel less like I'm treading water. We'll see.

I'm jumping between fandoms like I'm playing a game of hot potato. SGA, James Bond, Critical Role, Dresden Files, BFU. Right now I'm revisiting the Fullmetal Alchemist fandom, which is weird because I haven't watched the anime (either of them) in years. Then again, the last time I visited the Dresden Files fandom it was 2011, so...hm. Maybe it isn't so weird. I've also started reading Silmarillion fanfiction even though I've never read the book. A friend of mine told me about a ship of theirs from the book, and despite the many characters (why do they all have five names each??) and tragic events, I sought out fic and fell in love.

Buzzfeed Unsolved is officially done, but the boys have announced a ghost hunting show called Ghost Files on their own channel. My exhaustion/apathy means I'm behind on MANY of their stuff. I've also watched a few episodes of Only Murders in the Building and it's a perfect mix of comedy and mystery, and luckily I'm watching it with a friend - which means I'm actually going to finish it lol.

Literally nothing else of interest has happened ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Comments

[timespirt]

"HUGS"

The craziness will soon be over hon. Hang in here.

[popkin16]

*HUGS*

I really hope so!

[timespirt]

As long as your not in the returns department after Christmas...all is good.

LOL

"HUGS"

[popkin16]

I'm not - thank god LOL.

[esteefee]

Only Murders is absolutely charming. I love grumpy Steve Martin. I esp love the burgeoning, untrusting friendship bw Charles and Mabel. I'm only on ep 5 but I'm utterly smitten. Is there a discord where we can chat?

[popkin16]

Grumpy Steven Martin is my favorite, and I also really love the untrusting friendship between Charles and Mabel. I found it so interesting that the two more stand-offish characters were the ones to team up first.

A discord for Only Murders in the Building? I don't believe so, sadly :(

[esteefee]

also wanted to say how sorry I am you are so stressed, bubbe. sending you pets and hugs.

[popkin16]

Thank you, bb ♥

[juniperberry]

:tight hugs:

I'm sorry, dear. My work is also skeletally staffed, and we're also struggling with coworkers who are out sick or who have quit.

FMA is such a weird fandom for me? Like I've read some fic for it that I really liked, and I loved the 03 anime (which is the only one I've seen), but I've only been fannish for it in short, unsustained bursts.

I'm glad you've got enough fandoms to play hot potato with, though!

[popkin16]

*HUGS TIGHT*

Thanks bb. I'm sorry you're struggling at work too - the holidays is the worst time to be short staffed. I hope things improve for you soon!

FMA is such a weird fandom for me? Like I've read some fic for it that I really liked, and I loved the 03 anime (which is the only one I've seen), but I've only been fannish for it in short, unsustained bursts.
I've only seen the 03 anime as well, but I'm reading fic for Brotherhood and the movie too. I just roll with whatever the author goes with lmao.

I totally get having weird fandoms like that, though. No matter how hard I try, I can't get into the Sherlock fandom, for example. I've tried, for the BBC version and the Downey Jr movies, etc. My attention can't stick with it. I'm not sure what it is about FMA that's grabbed me so strongly, but I'm riding the wave while I feel it.

I'm also glad I have enough fandoms to play hot potato - circling back to the same ones over and over would SUCK.

[juniperberry]

Oh, yeah, I've been reading fic for Brotherhood, too--there's really no escaping it, even if I felt the need, so. I've been trying to rewatch it, too, but my attention span for TV of any kind has been shot this whole year. I managed to get through the first season of Killing Eve (very good, but dark) which deserves all the hype it has, but I haven't gotten through the rest of it even though I loved season 1.

I was sort of into Sherlock for a long while, actually! Not to the point of writing fic for it. I never saw past the second season, though, and from all accounts that was an excellent stopping point. The show wasn't actually all that good, but I can see why a fandom took off--it was absolute fangirl bait from the word go.

Anyway--ride that wave! Have fun with it!

[popkin16]

I've heard a lot about Killing Eve - I've seen gifs and stuff. It looks really good, but yeah - I haven't been in a mental space where I can handle dark stuff, so I haven't watched.

Oh yeah, I totally get why Sherlock is as popular as it is - especially the BBC version. And normally I'd be all over it, and I'm not sure why I'm not...but sometimes things just don't click with you *shrugs*

[juniperberry]

Yeah, Killing Eve is funny but it's also pretty dark, I don't recommend it if you're not in a good headspace for dark stuff.

Eh, on reflection Sherlock is fun, but it's not good. I think part of the appeal for a lot of fans is how very flawed and full of holes it is. (At least, up through season 2. Apparently after that the writing goes even further off the rails.) And yeah, sometimes stuff just doesn't click. I like Hannibal as a show, for example, but Hannigram doesn't grab me the way it apparently grabbed a lot of people--but then, I think I read it very differently from the majority of the fandom. Also I'm coming at it as an old CLAMP fan, so this is not my first innocent cinnamon roll/total monster ship. :D

[popkin16]

I haven't seen Hannibal for much the same reason I haven't seen Killing Eve. Also, on the whole, I'm not into fucked up ships - I use it to escape the heavy shit of the real world, so I don't really seek it out in my fandoms. It's funny to say I'm not into fucked up ships and then be a CLAMP fan...but I never got super hardcore into CLAMP anyway.

It's weird when you start to think about your habits and outlooks on things. Or maybe I'm just in my head too much lolll.

Do you have more fucked up ships than not? Is there a sort of 'type' of ship you tend to gravitate toward?

[juniperberry]

No, I think that's entirely fair to avoid the fucked-up ships because the world is fucked-up. Escapism is a beautiful thing, and fandom can absolutely deliver that. *hugs*

As far as CLAMP, eh. I've read almost all their manga and honestly most of their ships aren't that fucked up--barring the ones from X, Tokyo Babylon, and RG Veda, most of their ships are sweetness and light, especially in comparison, lol. I just happened to fall for the Drama of the Seishirou/Subaru ship before the whole Rainbow Bridge chapter came out, and fans were still speculating that those two might have a remotely happy ending.

Look, mistakes were made, okay.

I don't really ship fucked up ships on the regular. I do like to see dark detours and AUs sometimes, but darkfic is not really the same thing. I'd say most of my ships are fairly non-fucked up, but with enough shadow that they could be really dark if you wanted to view them that way--even Doumeki/Watanuki. One thing that shows up later in the manga, once Watanuki is the shopkeeper, is the idea that one day Watanuki might become something so bad that Doumeki would have to exorcise him, and like. I don't really think CLAMP will follow up with that in a way I'd like, or at all, but that's such a dark, sad, fucked-up take on their relationship. I kind of want to write it since I know CLAMP never will.

Does any of that make sense? *sheepish grin*

[popkin16]

So it turns out I'm really bad at keeping up on conversations via DW sa;ja; Do you have discord or twitter?

[juniperberry]

Sorry. no! I have some twitter accounts but I legit never use them, and it's gotten such a bad rep as a social media platform that I avoid it on principle at this point. And I've sort of poked at discord, but the format freaks me out tbh. I'm an old school sort, I guess.

I'm mostly on Dreamwidth and tumblr, when I'm on social media at all. I've got a FB account but at this point I'm mostly keeping it because that's where I talk with my friends who live in other states (and who are not old-school internet-savvy enough for sites like DW). FB creeps me out with all the spying and personalized ads, though, so I'm seriously considering shaving my accounts down to the bare bones there.

[popkin16]

That's completely understandable! I'll just have to get better at responding to comments on DW :) I think I've fallen out of the habit of holding discussions here lol.

I signed up for facebook really late, because I knew I wasn't ever going to use it. But people kept insisting I sign up, and then I never use it...

Anyway, how are you doing?

[juniperberry]

Dreamwidth is so weird because it's so much smaller than LJ, so it can feel like nothing happens, but then something does happen, like the Snowflake Challenge, and before you know it you have like ten more people in your friends' circle. At least, uh, at least if you're me. <.<

Facebook used to be actually usable. And then it wasn't. :/ If it weren't for RL family and friends that I keep in contact with through it, I'd have chucked it years ago. As soon as I develop a better way of keeping in touch (which will likely mean a return to old-school shit like phone calls) I'm stuck with it.

I'm okay! I'm struggling to actually write ideas, but that's nothing new. How are you?

[popkin16]

I don't update my DW as often as I should - mostly because I feel like I only complain about the same things (work), and these days I'm not in fandoms I share with my friends on here. I always mean to participate in the Snowflake challenge, and then I usually get halfway through and it peters out ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Oh well.

After Trump my desire to get on facebook waned even further; watching a portion of my family members fall for his crap made me lose all respect for them lol.

I'm doing ok! I'm still fandom hopping. I read the first 20 pages of my highest kudos'd page for my FMA ship, and after that things started to go downhill in terms of quality. I miss it though ;__; I'm dipping my toes in Bagginshield for the first time ever, but everything that's well loved is also like 100k or longer. I'm working on writing Dresden Files fic, but I haven't read many of the books in a long time - and the later books I haven't read at all - so I worry a lot about characterization and such. I keep telling myself I should write for *me* first, and I don't even have to post my stuff, but that seems less fun.

Other than that, I just work lol.

What are you trying to write about?

[juniperberry]

Eh, that's fair. But honestly I think the DW space has become much more pluralized in terms of fandoms--I had people friending me that I have, maybe, one or two small fandoms in common. I think it's become much more about people who post stuff you like to read, rather than just fandom stuff, and in many ways that's both good and not so good. As for content--well, I mostly bitch about writer's block, but I've taken to liveblogging things, too. I'm typing up a liveblog of Star Trek: Deep Space Nine right now, because I have Netflix for the moment and I've always wanted to watch it.

The Snowflake Challenge really is a challenge! I petered out about halfway through, too. :)

Ugh, the dictator-wannabe really exposed a lot of very ugly things for a lot of people. I have an aunt that I unfriended on FB because she kept sharing a lot of racist dogwhistley things.

Oooh, which ship? 20 pages of decent quality is pretty nice--I know the CLAMP fandoms, uh, do not have that kind of quality, unfortunately. Maybe if they were all combined, but not individually.

And yes, you should write for you first and foremost, but it's a lot easier sometimes if you know you have someone who wants to read your stuff. I hear that.

Re: my writing--a pile of WIPs that are mostly due South, and mostly those two dorks in my icon. The rest of them are CLAMP stuffs--lots of TRC, bizarrely, and some xxxHolic (like that vampire!Watanuki fic I mentioned once before). I haven't been fanworky-fannish for very many things, and I'm a little astonished that due South has just dug into me the way it has, but....*shrug* I'm enjoying the ride, even if I struggle to actually get the stories done. And it is a pile! Here is a partial, now out-of-date list.

[popkin16]

I think it's become much more about people who post stuff you like to read, rather than just fandom stuff-
That makes a lot of sense, really. This really feels more like a community for making friends than tumblr does. I started watching DS9 a while back, and it didn't click for me. There were no characters I loved, and though I hear it gets plotty and really good later, there was none of that at the beginning. I hope you're enjoying it though!

Oooh, which ship? 20 pages of decent quality is pretty nice
I ship Roy/Ed in FMA. There's lots of good fic, and I ended up bookmarking 225+ fics. I just want mooooore.

I've noticed that CLAMP doesn't tend to result in big fandoms - which is a real shame, and something I lamented a lot when I was deep into xxxHolic.

This conversation has really inspired me, and I hope to get some writing done tonight. Even if I do post the fic and nobody reads it (which either way it won't get much attention, since the fandom is so small), at least I can reread it and (hopefully) enjoy it.

Oh man, you have so many WIPs that sound awesome *makes grabby hands*

[juniperberry]

I'm liking it thus far! I was raised on Star Trek, but I've never felt fanworkly fannish about it, so if I don't come out of it with a fave that's fine. For me the fact that it's Star Trek is enough to make me give it a chance, and '90s Trek is like. Nostalgia comfort space.

Roy/Ed does have a lot of compelling and interesting fic. *nod nod*

Yeah, I think for CLAMP it's just the hurdle of their best stuff being manga, not anime. Anime is easy to sit and watch, but manga is hard to get ahold of (or it used to be) by comparison. I think the bar of accessibility is just a lot higher there.

Whoohoo! Have fun writing! I absolutely write the fics that I want to read, and then I get annoyed when that author hasn't updated in...waitaminute....

Thank you! Fun fact: that due South/Leverage crossover was dead in the water, and then Leverage: Redemption revealed that the entire team avoids Canada and they're all terrified of Mounties.

[squidgiepdx]

I get you with fandom hopping right now. I've read nearly every fic on AO3 that's Nursey/Dex, so I've been reading The Losers right now. But Check, Please! is having a big bang soon so there will be new fic to read. I saw a post on Tumblr about a Ransom/Holster fic that got posted, so it might already be going.

And I'm really glad the boys are going to do a ghost hunting show on their own!! :)

> Literally nothing else of interest has happened ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

OMG same. When people at the store, etc ask politely, "So what're you doing this weekend?" I just look at them like, "What CAN we do that doesn't involve catching covid?!?!" ::sigh::

[popkin16]

I've read every single Dresden Files fic that features my ship of choice. I've resorted to writing my own, but it's hard has *hell* to get the dynamic right. I'm sorry that you have to feel that pain as;kja At least you got a big bang soon! Get that new fic!!

And I'm really glad the boys are going to do a ghost hunting show on their own!! :)
Me too! They deserve this, and I want it to be a success. I hope all the Unsolved fans tune in and their channel EXPLODES.

OMG same. When people at the store, etc ask politely, "So what're you doing this weekend?" I just look at them like, "What CAN we do that doesn't involve catching covid?!?!" ::sigh::
YES!! Exactly. I basically go to work, come home, and get online. That's it. I don't feel safe doing anything else. I like a quiet life, but damn.

[melagan]

*smishes you*

When you feel up to chatting let me know, darlin'

[popkin16]

*HUGS*

Thanks for being so understanding ♥ I want to join the chats, but I'm always just so tired, it feels like Too Much *sigh*

[runpunkrun]

Hang in there, buddy. <3 <3 <3

[popkin16]

Thank you, friend ♥

[logicgunn]

I'm sorry you are so stressed! Brain fog really is the worst.

I wish for a completely uneventful January for you so you can chill. xx

[popkin16]

Thank you - me too :(