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Nov. 12th, 2020 03:17 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
popkin16Work continues to be fucking awful. It actually picked up for a little bit there in terms of pleasantness, but now we're doing this "online only" Black Friday event thing every Saturday through Tuesday. They took half my team (all the guys, basically) and stuck me with mostly new people. The newbies are working their butts off and I appreciate them, but it's not the same as having experienced people. So while they're out chilling in lawn and garden, we're overwhelmed and incredibly stressed. AND we're forced to field all the calls about the event. It's been a very, very bad week.
This isn't helped by my ongoing mental health issues. I've never struggled like this before, and I'm having more and more "bad" days where I'm keeping myself from screaming by the skin of my teeth. I haven't been doing much - I mostly just screw around online until it's time for bed. I hang out on a shipping server for BFU and it's bringing me so much joy right now, but some days even that feels like Too Much. My coworker said she takes ashwagandha supplements for anxiety and stress, and it helps. I'm thinking of trying it, but gotta do research first.
In better news, I have a set schedule! I have every Monday and Thursday off, and I LOVE IT. It means I never have to work more than 3 days in a row, which is a blessing given the stress of life.
I've been playing Phasmophobia with a co-worker. You play as ghost hunters, going into haunted locations and trying to gather evidence to figure out what kind of spirit you're dealing with. I don't find it particularly scary, but my co-worker does, so it's fun to laugh at her when she gets scared. I feel like it'd be the PERFECT game for Shane & Ryan from BFU to play, but I don't know much about copyright laws and stuff that might prevent them. How do gamers get away with playing games, actually? Since they do make money off it via ads and such.
I wrote a 36k fic for BFU, which I'm both proud of and hate intensely. I wasn't going to share it - it was supposed to be for just me, to ease me back into writing - but the shipping server was like DO IT. SHARE IT. And I am weak for validation. I've been thinking about John & Rodney a lot, and how much I love them. Since I've been so low energy lately, I've thought about rewatching some eps.
Would it be wrong of me to take a COVID leave from work just so I could try to get some fic reading done? js;kfaj; Don't answer that.
This isn't helped by my ongoing mental health issues. I've never struggled like this before, and I'm having more and more "bad" days where I'm keeping myself from screaming by the skin of my teeth. I haven't been doing much - I mostly just screw around online until it's time for bed. I hang out on a shipping server for BFU and it's bringing me so much joy right now, but some days even that feels like Too Much. My coworker said she takes ashwagandha supplements for anxiety and stress, and it helps. I'm thinking of trying it, but gotta do research first.
In better news, I have a set schedule! I have every Monday and Thursday off, and I LOVE IT. It means I never have to work more than 3 days in a row, which is a blessing given the stress of life.
I've been playing Phasmophobia with a co-worker. You play as ghost hunters, going into haunted locations and trying to gather evidence to figure out what kind of spirit you're dealing with. I don't find it particularly scary, but my co-worker does, so it's fun to laugh at her when she gets scared. I feel like it'd be the PERFECT game for Shane & Ryan from BFU to play, but I don't know much about copyright laws and stuff that might prevent them. How do gamers get away with playing games, actually? Since they do make money off it via ads and such.
I wrote a 36k fic for BFU, which I'm both proud of and hate intensely. I wasn't going to share it - it was supposed to be for just me, to ease me back into writing - but the shipping server was like DO IT. SHARE IT. And I am weak for validation. I've been thinking about John & Rodney a lot, and how much I love them. Since I've been so low energy lately, I've thought about rewatching some eps.
Would it be wrong of me to take a COVID leave from work just so I could try to get some fic reading done? js;kfaj; Don't answer that.
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Date: 2020-11-12 08:52 am (UTC)At least the silver lining is that you have a set schedule, and no longer have to work so many days in a row, that must be a relief.
Just hang in there until the event is over, and hopefully things will ease up a bit then. Vent if you need to, play games if you need to, whatever works, just take care of yourself. Sending you lots of love and hugs, ♥!
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Date: 2020-11-19 09:37 am (UTC)Vent if you need to, play games if you need to, whatever works, just take care of yourself. Sending you lots of love and hugs, ♥!
Thank you bb <3 I'm usually too brain dead once I get home from work to be able to do much, but I appreciate you and the support you give me so much.
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Date: 2020-11-12 01:19 pm (UTC)I have been lax about commenting on your BFU fic, which I read eagerly as soon as each new chapter goes up. I'll catch up, I promise, because I really am enjoying it!
Speaking of BFU, I was super sad to learn that Watcher Weekly is going on indefinite hiatus, but then happy again when they read your name on the callouts. ::grins::
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Date: 2020-11-19 09:39 am (UTC)I have been lax about commenting on your BFU fic, which I read eagerly as soon as each new chapter goes up. I'll catch up, I promise, because I really am enjoying it!
sfja;kj;s you don't have to do that. It's so awkward when an author you love reads your own work.
Speaking of BFU, I was super sad to learn that Watcher Weekly is going on indefinite hiatus, but then happy again when they read your name on the callouts. ::grins::
Are they still going to be doing Watcher Weekly+? I'm sad WW is going away too, but I'm super excited that Too Many Spirits s2 is currently being filmed :D
I'm on a BFU shipping server, and one of the mods changed my name to "poopkin" because apparently Ryan almost called me that a;skjdas;
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Date: 2020-11-12 01:23 pm (UTC)I#ve finished my Secret Santa story!! But my daughter is doing the beta and she's busy with an SPN J2 challenge fic so won't be sorting out my stuff till that's posted at the end of November. Still, I've finished!!
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Date: 2020-11-19 09:40 am (UTC)Damn, look at you go, already finished with your secret santa story!! Congratulations, you are AWESOME ads;kaj
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Date: 2020-11-12 02:03 pm (UTC)I take a Stress B-Complex vitamin and find it helps. (just throwing that out there)
Black Friday - I have no answer for that. Will hope your new people catch on super quick.
Congrats on finishing your story!!!! That's awesome.
((((HUGS)))
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Date: 2020-11-12 02:23 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-11-12 07:59 pm (UTC)I'm sorry work is crap right now - but you have to take time for you, because otherwise you'll burn yourself out.
I did a little research on Ashwaganda, and started taking it. My stress is about the same, but I will say it's doing something because since I started taking it, my dreams are MUCH more intense. In a good way.
Thinking good thoughts for you!!!
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Date: 2020-11-19 09:42 am (UTC)I desperately want to request a mini-vacation, but given it's the holiday season and we're short staffed, I suspect she won't approve it. I could call in, but I'd use up my protected PTO, and I only have 25 hours left and won't get any more until February.
I did a little research on Ashwaganda, and started taking it. My stress is about the same, but I will say it's doing something because since I started taking it, my dreams are MUCH more intense. In a good way.
I've started taking it too. I'm remembering my dreams, which I normally don't. They don't seem particularly different. But I *have* noticed my mood has improved.
Thank you for the good thoughts <3